May 6, 2010

Get on with it....

I came in with the full intention of being a whiner today. It's been one of those weeks. Where I wake up in a horrible mood first thing Tuesday morning, and that mindset continues for the rest of the week. Nothing seems to go right, I hate my job, people make me mad, I don't feel good, I'm listening to a child screaming at the top of it's lungs as I currently write this....it's been that kind of week. Sitting down to my computer, I planned to unleash my full wrath of emotions, disappointment and frustration. I want to write about how financing is NOT at all what I want to do with my life. How I hate sitting at a desk 8 hours a day, talking about auto equity loans and ATM deposit holds. How I feel my creativity and brain cells slowly dying away while I tell people their credit score and how it got to be that high/low. I wanted to write about applying for job after job, only to be told that I don't have the experience necessary for that position. How I am at a total loss on how to gain said experience if no one is willing to take the chance and hire me in the first place. I wanted to write how I have been experiencing intense stomach pain for the past 7+ months, only to find I have a bacteria in my stomach, go on an intense round of antibiotics to supposedly kill it and then have the pain return. How I have a "consultation" with a surgical specialist next week and I am scared to death of having a colonscopy or an endoscopy or whatever other "scopy" that involves sticking a camera where a camera isn't supposed to go. I wanted to write about how I've seen at least 15 things that I want to buy for the spring season, only to be restricted by my stupid self-imposed shopping ban. This was my plan this morning....I thought the writing would be cathartic and make me feel better about my all-around crappy week. And then we opened our doors for business this morning. And a lady walks into my office and is practically in tears over the loss of her credit card and the charges that were made to her account by some hoodlum. And I realize that I am whining over a job when there's a lot of people that don't have one. I'm whining about not being able to buy things I want, but thank God I have the money available to do so. So many people have it worse...what gives me the right to complain about not being able to shop or being forced to discuss interest rates? I wish I could have this attitude more often. Unfortunately, I get caught up in the "not me's" and the "it's so unfair" attitude and complain more often than I should. But today I've been enlightened. It's ridiculous for me to complain whenever I have so many things to be thankful about. If you know me at all, you know that I have a teensy obsession with quotes. I shouldn't have looked any further than the wonderful Ms. Hepburn: "It's that wonderful, old-fashioned idea that others come first and you come second. This was the whole ethic by which I was brought up. Others matter more than you do, so 'don't fuss, dear; get on with it.'" Thanks Audrey.

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